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(c) 2010 AllThingsSD.com

OK, I’ll admit that it’s highly hackneyed of me to publish a manifesto on New Year’s Eve. I’m not a fan of New Year’s resolutions – who even keeps the things into February? – and this is not a set of resolutions.

My inspiration(s) for this post are vast and varied. Some are between my ears, and will remain there. External inspiration includes

This list is a line in the sand. A statement, in public, of what I will and will not allow to exist in my self, in my work, or in my proximity. Some of these have taken decades to learn. Some are very recent epiphanies. I’m not going to indicate which are which … you figure it out for yourself, on your own behalf.

#1: Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.

One of the greatest skills anyone can learn is adaptability. I learned this at my mother’s knee as a 2nd-generation Navy daughter who was the New Kid almost every year K-12. I learned how to manage rampaging nuns determined to punish children because of their own sexual frustrations, how to handle playground bullies, how to show up even when the very idea of doing so scares the shit out of you.

Adaptability is a terrific tool. Taken to excess, though, it turns into approval-seeking. Since I’ve moved from one of the biggest cities on Earth to a small city that I’ve taken to calling Jimbobwe from time to time, I’ve been guilty of hiding my ferocity somewhat. Not all the time, but often enough that I don’t think I’ve served myself, or my purpose.

I will not hide my fierce. Neither will I use it as a weapon. If someone finds me too fierce, they’re not in my crew. We’ll part amicably. Nuff said.

#2: Get paid for your expertise (I call this one “move from town slut to town whore”)

Yes, the economy sucks. Yes, Wall Street has much to answer for, as does Capitol Hill. That does not mean that you should resort to either whiny-bitchery or yessuh-massah-ry. Grow a pair and GET PAID. This is particularly true if you’re a small business owner, but it’s also true if you’re working on someone’s payroll.

If you’ve got skills, exchange them for a fair price. If you’re not getting a living dollar for your work, ask yourself why not. Are you selling the wrong thing? Is your skill-set outdated? Are you simply rolling over in order not to be seen as demanding? Make this an ongoing strategy-fest for yourself. What’s your best sell, who’s your best customer base, is it sustainable. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Grrlz, this one is particularly important for you. If you’re not willing to embrace and empower your inner bitch, you’ll be eating leftovers for the rest of your life. I’m not advising you to go all Cruella DeVille on ever’body’s ass. Just don’t turn into the people-pleasing Good Girl who always serves herself last. Therein lies fiscal starvation. Take it from one who knows.

#3: Fail forward daily

Don’t let a day go by without shaking something up, even if it’s only the space between your own ears. Don’t sit passively when something you can fix presents itself. And most definitely don’t sit there clutching something that’s broken, or that needs to be kicked to the curb.

Anchors are great if you’re a ship. If you hang one around your neck, though, there’s always the risk that it, and you, will wind up falling overboard. The anchor won’t drown. It’s a damn anchor. You, however, will be most uncomfortable. Followed quickly by the aforementioned drowning. Anchoring yourself to anything but a solid set of ethical principles is crazy.

Decide. Do. If that leads to #fail, decide to move on and live to do another day. Do NOT stick with something just because it’s safe/yours/your friend’s/the-thing-you-sunk-3-years-in. Question and assess everything, every day. If it doesn’t serve you, serve it with an eviction notice.

And speaking of eviction notices …

#4: Give fear an eviction notice

I learned this in a very direct way this year, which I will forever refer to as the Year of Living Eviction-ously.

I started the year by getting an eviction notice in late January. I freaked out, and hyperventilated my way toward finding a solution. This kept up in February, and March, and April … you’re getting the drift, aren’t you? Every month turned into Panic City. Who does their best thinking in Panic City? Certainly not me.

One plus of getting monthly eviction notices is this: you get inured (look it up) to them. I did, and stopped panicking around May. It didn’t mean I wasn’t under pressure – I most certainly was – but it did mean that I stopped freaking out and started strategizing on solutions. The net-net is that I ended the Year of Living Eviction-ously without a perfect record. No eviction notice for Christmas, and it doesn’t look like there will be one  in January. See #2 if you have any questions about a working strategy here.

#5: Trust but verify. Even when it’s yourself.

You’ve spent [however long] getting yourself to where you are today. You did not do it alone, though, did you? You had help.

There are people you’ve trusted along the way to provide you with insight and advice, to help keep you on the path, to point you in the right direction if you found yourself in the weeds.

You now know it all, right? (If you answered “yes” please stop reading. You’ve just failed the Stupid Test.)

If you think you know everything, you know nothing. You’re doomed without a kitchen cabinet of people you can trust to bitch slap you, with a 5 iron if necessary, to keep you from making a bad choice. Whether it’s a client or a mate.

Trust yourself enough to assemble that kitchen cabinet, and then vet your options with them whenever you need guidance.

That’s my Manifesto for 2012. What’s yours?

 

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Dec
19

Make Congress work? I’m in!

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After spending [redacted] years in network news, covering every Presidential race from 1980 to 2004, my level of exhaustion and cynicism when it comes to politics is … epic. I vote in every election, because dammit-that’s-my-right-as-a-citizen, but often it’s a case of holding my nose and doing the best I can with the (rotten) choices I’m offered.

When I was invited to Capitol Hill last Tuesday, Dec. 13, to be in the room when a new Make Congress Work initiative was announced, I accepted with some of that exhaustion and cynicism. But like the old news warhorse I am, I saddled up and rode up I-95 to see what I could see.

What I saw made me feel like someone who’s been wandering in the wilderness for … ever, who stumbles upon a tidy little town that welcomes the weary wanderer with open arms. And gives her a job: help spread the news about the tidy little town. Help it grow into a big ol’ city.

So think of this as metaphorical political tourism. You can come along on the trip and enjoy the scenery with me.

Oh, come on, work with me, people. I’m a writer, and sometimes a comedian. I’ll bring this all home, I promise.

Here’s what happened: over 400 people showed up in the Caucus Room at the Cannon House Office Building to talk with, and listen to, a literal parade of bipartisan leaders from all points of the political compass.

The point? To break the chains of gridlock that have the folks we elected to represent us in a constant state of get-nothing-done.

That point was tidily contained in a 12-point plan to literally make Congress work. For its pay, for its privileges, and most importantly for the CITIZENS THAT ELECTED THEM TO OFFICE.

OK, I’ll stop shouting. I just get excited at the idea of those do-nothings actually doing something.

Here are the 12 points:

  1. No budget, no pay. [This is a personal favorite. If I don't produce for my clients, I don't get paid. Why should Congress?]
  2. Up-or-down vote on Presidential appointments. [Must vote within 90 days. No vote? Confirmed by default!]
  3. Fix the filibuster. [Sentimental memories of Jimmy Stewart in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington are Hollywood fiction. What really happens is a process hijacking. It has to end in order for the business of our country to move forward.]
  4. Empower the sensible majority. [Simply stated: don't let the wing-nuts run away with the game.]
  5. Make members come to work. [Love this one. They quote Woody Allen: 90% of life is just showing up. So ... SHOW UP.]
  6. Question time for the President. [Britain's Parliament has Q&A sessions, in public, with the Prime Minister. As should the President and Congress. Just sayin' ... ]
  7. Fiscal report to Congress: Hear it. Read it. Sign it. [The Comptroller General should give a where-we're-at report annually. With real numbers. What a concept.]
  8. No pledge but the oath of office. [LOVE THIS. Grover Norquist and his ilk can go sit down and shut up.]
  9. Monthly bi-partisan gatherings. [It's harder to demonize or vilify someone you actually know. 'Nuf said.]
  10. Bi-partisan seating. [Sitting next to a member of the opposition makes you a little less likely to call him/her a dirtbag. Really.]
  11. Bi-partisan Leadership Committee. [No more R or D pep rallies. Leadership means making progress, even when the going gets tough.]
  12. No negative campaigns against incumbents. [What this means is that Senator Whoever with an R after his/her name can't campaign against Senator Whichever with a D after his/her name. Stop the attack-ad insanity.]

Want to come hang out in the tidy little town? Join the No Labels movement. Share the message on Facebook, Twitter, your blog, skywriting, cave painting, whatever.

Let’s make this tidy town a bustling city. And get Congress to work for US for a change.

That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it …

 

 

Categories : Politics, Social media
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Dec
12

Year-end career-end in review

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This year has seen some really stunning examples of how to completely screw oneself, and one’s career, in public. Here’s a review of some of my favorites:

  •  Anthony Weiner’s wiener: Do not take a picture of your package and post it on Twitter. This is a rule for everyone. If you do this, be prepared to watch the job you’ve had for 12 years disappear in a bright, shiny flash. And to become a never-ending joke in the process.
  • Aflac duck drowns in tsunami: Gilbert Gottfried managed to tank his career with some very ill-advised tweets in the days immediately after the Fukushima tsunami. Note to self: when hired to provide humor and comedy material for a client, insult comedy is the *wrong* approach.
  • GoDaddy CEO shoots elephant, wounds brand: Bob Parsons shot an elephant, and almost brought down the mastodon that is the GoDaddy brand in the process. When your business is high-profile, low-profile hobbies are a good bet. Take up golf. Much less likelihood of killing your brand with a 5-iron.
  • Ashton Kutcher is a no-talent jerk. Who knew? Well, actually, I think a lot of us knew. But when he leapt to Joe Paterno’s defense in the hours after the Penn State pederasty parade started up, he showed just how clueless and tone-deaf he is. Along with that total lack of talent. I almost felt sorry for Demi. Almost.

Some rules to live by: don’t do or say anything on social media that you wouldn’t want on the 1st page, above the fold, of the New York Times. Because that’s exactly what could happen, even if you’re not Anthony Weiner, Gilbert Gottfried, Bob Parsons, Ashton Kutcher, or countless other social media idiots.

That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it …

 

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unfortunate xmas decisionsYes, kids, it’s that time of year again.

ChristmaHanaKwanzaKah is once again in the hearts and on the minds of everyone from sea to shining sea – and beyond – so it’s time for a remedial lesson on How to Succeed in Business Without Really Lying.

Here are the Mighty Casey Media rules for surviving the holidays with your sanity – and your client list – intact:

  • Don’t be a grinch. If you’re not a big fan of the holidays, don’t trash those who are. You don’t have to go overboard and wear a pair of reindeer antlers all month, yet neither do you have to tell the office Christmas Elf that s/he is crazy for loving the holidays.
  • Be a gracious guest. If you’re invited to a holiday celebration by a client or a colleague, accept with thanks. Attend with intent to find the cheer. Bring a friend along who could be a good prospect for the business. Holiday gifts can come in the form of customers. Take it from one who knows.
  • Be a thoughtful host. If you host a holiday gathering, make sure to keep the conversation and connection flowing. Configure your party so there’s plenty of opportunity to interact, and make the rounds continually to ensure that everyone is enjoying themselves. And have a defined end-time for the party, which saves having to shovel folks out the door.
  • If you can’t deal, deal yourself out. If the holidays drive you nuts, that seems like a great excuse to take off on a vacation, a retreat, or a sabbatical. Deal yourself out of the holiday merry-go-round, and return to the game refreshed after Santa’s blown town.

Merry ChristmaHanaKwanzaKah to all, and to all a way to make the end-of-year insanity work for you!

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Angry Birds occupy Capitol Hill?

(c) 2011 Walt Handelsman | Newsday

Heaving scrums from coast to coast are occupying public squares to protest what seems to be the greatest concentration of personal wealth since the Gilded Age at the end of the 19th century. Their ire is directed at Wall Street, which does bear some of the blame for the epic meltdown of the US – and global – economy over the last four years.

The biggest share of the blame, however, really belongs on another street entirely: K Street. The street of lobbying dreams, chock full of high-dollar law and PR firms that work Capitol Hill relentlessly on behalf of everything from AARP to zoologists.

Individual taxpayers have no access to K Steet influence, unless they’re members of an interest group – like the aforementioned AARP – that has enough chedda to hire a lobbying firm.

Congress, both the House and the Senate, depend on special interest money to mount successful election campaigns.

The electorate – the taxpayers, we individual voters who head to the polls to hold our noses and do the best we can with the choices offered – are offered those choices for national office based on who can raise the most money, and spend it to get our attention.

And now that corporations are people – thank you, Citizens United – they are under no restraint whatsoever when it comes to political donations.

Have you completed the calculation yet? Here’s what it boils down to:

Corporate $ + K Street (Congress) = We’re Screwed

That may seem simplistic, but it captures the essence.

Do not mistake me – I am a capitalist. I believe that every citizen – including corporate ones – has the right to appeal on behalf of his or her interests to elected officials. Where we find ourselves today, though, is at a very broken place.

Most Americans see their financial futures as, if not stormy, at least cloudy with a chance of bankruptcy. They see their children’s future prospects sinking, since the college degree required for an entry level corporate gig will now saddle those kids with a level of debt that will keep them living on ramen noodles well into their 30s.

How does the American Dream work in that scenario? How does hard work – to get a degree, to start a career, to start a business – actually work to advance your cause if most of the marketplace is on the ragged edge of broke?

A commitment to re-tooling our educational system to a 21st century model (instead of the 19th century “train factory workers” model currently in place) and a simultaneous commitment to bringing our national infrastructure up to date would be a step in the right direction. Unfortunately, the occupants of Capitol Hill are more interested in bleating about the lack of jobs than actually creating jobs by taking those actions.

We have a broken bureaucratic biosphere, and we’re choking on sewage. The gridlock on Capitol Hill has reached Nero-with-a-fiddle proportions, with no progress in sight on any issue. Congress isn’t actively doing anything other than saying why it can’t (won’t?) do anything, and we’re at a stasis point until the 2012 election … ?

What’s missing here is balance. There has to be a balance struck between totally unrestrained free markets – can you say Enron? – and government redistribution of wealth via the tax system. There has to be a balance struck between “do for yourself” and a safety net for the most helpless among us.

The only path that I see to that balance is term limits … for Congress. They were real good at setting term limits on the occupants of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue: two terms, yer out. Winning a House or a Senate seat, however, can mean lifetime employment as long as you can keep getting re-elected.

Even if you can’t keep getting re-elected ad infinitum, you can take advantage of the revolving door connecting the US Capitol to K Street.

The real problem? The folks who have to draft and pass term limits legislation are … Congress. Yeah, they’d have to stamp themselves with expiration dates. Which they are demonstrably loath to do.

And their re-election ad campaigns – financed largely by their buddies on K Street and their pals in state capitals across the land – will work hard to scare us into the horrors that will befall us should we fail to vote them back in to “finish the job.” Which “job” is likely to be more gridlock, followed by another round of “re-elect me to finish the job.”

A quote attributed to Winston Churchill says that “America will always do the right thing, but only after exhausting all other options.”

I hope we are about to exhaust the last of our options before demanding that Congress actually conduct the business of the people. Let’s occupy K Street to help drive that message home.

That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it …

congressional sealOK. So they’re not really managing change on Capitol Hill. They’re resisting change, hard, on both sides of the aisle.

Therein lies the lesson.

In order for any organization, from the corner grocery to the US Congress, to successfully transform itself to meet a changing environment, there are a few don’ts. Here they are, in no particular order:

  1. Don’t enter the process with a list of sacred cows. That might seem like a no-brainer, but think about every negotiation you’ve been privy to. From the NBA’s failure to have a 2011-2012 season to Congress’ failure to have a meaningful budget discussion, sacred cows – also known variously as “deal breakers” or “temper tantrums” – doom the process from the outset.
  2. Don’t forget why you’re there. You’re not there to score points, to prove you’re right, or to prove the other side’s wrong. You’re there – all of you, everyone – to move a culture forward. That means that everyone has to be willing to actually move. Which  means you can’t stand in the way just because you’re not running the game.
  3. Don’t fail to listen to the outliers. Are there any visionaries at your table? Particularly the kind that are looking so hard down the road that they don’t get caught up in turf fights? Ask them what they’re seeing in the process, and where they see opportunities to break stalemates. Be aware that these are often people who don’t speak up first. Or even second. So ask, and then listen.
  4. Don’t make it a fight. If the discussion gets heated, take a break. If it gets heated every single time there’s a meeting, identify the flamethrowers and deny them fuel. Take away their sacred cows, remind them of their stake in making actual progress. Or fire them. If they’re the CEO … quit.

The saddest thing about the current lack of change leadership in Washington is that the entire crew has forgotten that, in their zeal to hew to their party’s platform, they’re trampling the customers: us. They’re not listening to the frustration of their market – taxpayers – and making meaningful change that will move the organization forward to at least a shot at what might pass for a balanced budget.

So if you’re looking to drive meaningful change in your organization, here’s the last and biggest don’t: don’t act like the jerk-tards on Capitol Hill.

That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it …

 

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